Ulligunde - Passion, fear and the rush of a summit

This change in focus came about in steps. I started out in the classic way in college with trekking, hiking and indoor climbing, later I added alpine routes and then ice climbing – those activites have just always been extremely appealing to me. However, in all of this, I had an issue with anxiety, I have always had the motivation to face it and work with it, but it never really went away, I just learned to deal with it.

A few years ago I added paragliding and later bikepacking - and at the same time I moved away from alpine climbing to challenging mountaineering. Aside from the sheer beauty of high alpine sunrises, I have enormously enjoyed being able to routinely, efficiently and independently undertake these challenging alpine routes. I have had countless moments of absolute 'flow', feeling fully connected to my environment, for example when I climbed the Doldenhorn.

Until the shocking day two years ago on the Schreckhorn, when before my eyes my mountain partner had a fatal accident. After a rather long period of mourning, during which I did absolutely nothing, my paraglider brought me back to life, and I recently started climbing again.

 Of course, the tragic and fatal accident of my friend was something that I will never forget, but I have also experienced so many incredibly beautiful experiences - in particular, very long, high-alpine routes with my husband (Devil's Ridge on Mont Blanc!) or somewhat smaller routes, with equally fit & physically capable women - these experiences are always something very special to me.

I just love change and new things! I think you get to learn so much about yourself when you take on new challenges. Learning to paraglide, I was put in the unusual situation of being an absolute beginner -  with no flying experience, you are literally completely overwhelmed with everything initially. A beautiful exercise in humility!

I come from a family of sailors, and my father has a real fear of heights. I remember,  as a teenager, seeing a picture of a woman who was using ice tools and crampons to climb, and I was completely fascinated by it - I can't say exactly why. At the same time, I was totally convinced that I could never do something like this. To have proven yourself wrong in your own self-doubts is a very powerful feeling, for example when ice climbing at Il Droc in Val Gardena. Today, when I find myself thinking that I can't do something, I know that it does not have to be true.

When you turn your hobby into a profession, you inevitably lose some of it - but I can console myself with the fact that every now and then I get paid for climbing mountains and being outdoors! Anyway - there's something to complain about in every profession isn't there!? The fact that I now get to know so many special people through the podcast, and have the chance to talk to them in peace and quiet, is a huge gift. Just like the fact that I can earn money with my pictures and drawings. I am very grateful for this life! There are, of course also stressful moments with self-employment, but that's part of it.

Above all else, Just do it! We humans are brilliant at overthinking things and getting caught up in worst-case scenario thoughts. When you take the first step (with reasonable planning and know-how, of course), it usually turns out well! Both with a pitch that looks difficult from below, as with a summit that seems so far away.

I noticed on my three-week bike trip through Scotland, how often people told me how brave my trip was. I always ask them what they are specifically afraid of, most of the time, they mention things that are extremely unlikely. Their fears are so often based on things stirred up in childhood. Of course I take certain safety precautions, but I also have a certain amount of faith in myself and in life. As I said, it usually turns out well - and if it doesn't, I just take life as it comes! In any case, I'm more afraid on a backstreet in Glasgow than camped in my tent in the wild!

The mountains have also taught me: To have the self-confidence to do so much more than I think I'm capable of. To treasure the strong bonds that develop between people when you go through genuine emotions together. The realization of how quickly life can be over and how painful this game we play in the mountains can be. On the other hand, how wonderful every day is with a healthy body, a joyful mood, shared with awesome people! 

My personal experience is that women are much more open about their feelings, concerns and doubts. They look out for each other, particularly in the case of sharing a demanding undertaking. I find it reassuring to know that I can express my fears openly, no matter how irrational they may seem. Of course, there are also many men who are like this, but some can not understand certain fears and often do not have the necessary tact to deal with it appropriately. With women, in my experience, it's not the achievement that's in the foreground, but the shared experience. Last but not least, I often climb more proficiently with women because I don't have the comfort of a 'ropegun' (climbing partner who climbs all pitches) with me, so you have to solve all of the problems and difficult situations yourself. This provides me with heaps of self-assurance and confidence and shows once again that we women can often do more than we think!

I just got back from three amazing weeks of bikepacking in Scotland and I am deep in work - so at the moment my head is not yet in planning mode. I've started climbing again this year and I am really enjoying it - it would be brilliant if the desire for alpine climbing would come back too! Otherwise, I'm just looking for meaningful moments in the mountains with lots of joy, moments of 'flow' and great people. I'll keep an open mind - until two years ago I always said I hated cycling! So maybe next year I'll sail across the Atlantic or start riding? Who knows what's coming! Anyway, I'm looking forward to whatever else my life has in store!